Parenthood as the School of the Cross

When my first two children were a month old, I had to take them to the pediatrician by myself. They were twins – tiny, fussy, and very loud. For some reason I can no longer remember, I was the only adult available, and I found myself standing in the waiting room with two screaming infants, brand new to parenthood and completely unsure of what to do.

I remember looking at them and thinking, I can't hold you both. I have no idea what I’m supposed to do right now.

It was one of the first moments I felt truly helpless as a parent.

And it would not be the last.

The World Doesn’t Understand Parenthood

Our culture tends to treat children as a lifestyle choice – or a burden. Parenting is something people are warned about, delayed, avoided, or entered into reluctantly. We’re told that freedom means not being responsible for anyone else. That maturity means independence. That self-fulfillment comes from self-focus.

But the truth is very different.

Parenthood is not a detour from holiness. It is one of its most sacred paths.

What Parenthood Teaches

Parenthood is a school of love. It forms the soul in a thousand quiet ways:

• Through sleepless nights

• Through feeding and cleaning and comforting

• Through sacrifice that no one applauds

• Through forgiving your children

• Through forgiving yourself

You learn to give. And give. And give again.

And somewhere along the way, you realize that you are being changed. Not in spite of the exhaustion, but because of it. Your strength grows. Your patience deepens. Your pride is chipped away.

Parenthood reveals your limits – and calls you beyond them.

The Cross, Daily

Jesus said, "Take up your cross and follow me." He was not being poetic.

Every day, parenting invites you to imitate Christ:

• To lay down your comfort

• To serve when you feel empty

• To carry burdens for someone who cannot carry them alone

  
  

This is not punishment. It is purification. It is the slow transformation of love.

Holiness doesn’t usually come in grand gestures. It comes in car seats and lunch packing and bedtime prayers. It comes in the decision to keep showing up with love, even when no one sees it.

The End of Control

One of the most humbling things about being a parent is realizing how little you control.

You can’t control your child’s emotions. You can’t always fix their problems. You can’t force virtue into them by willpower.

What you can do is be present. Pray. Forgive. Teach. Stay.

You can love them in their weakness while admitting your own.

Glimpses of the Father

Through parenting, we begin to understand God in new ways. Not just intellectually, but viscerally.

We see His patience. His mercy. His delight in us. His heartbreak when we wander. His love that never runs dry.

Parenthood is not just about raising children. It is about being raised in holiness through the work of love.

And it mirrors the heart of the Father.

This Is the Path

If you are a parent and you feel tired, discouraged, or unsure whether you’re doing enough, remember this:

You are not behind. You are not wasting your time .You are not less holy because your prayer is interrupted or your house is noisy.

You are walking the road Christ walked. A road of self-emptying. A road of love.

Parenthood is not a distraction from sanctity. It is a daily participation in it.

This is the path.