Why Our Culture Feels So Immature

Something isn’t right.

We have more wealth, more access to education, more entertainment, and more personal freedom than any previous generation – and yet, our culture feels emotionally stunted. We seem to be stuck in a kind of collective adolescence. Fragile. Self-absorbed. Easily offended. Desperate for affirmation but unable to handle correction. Obsessively concerned with being seen and validated, but resistant to commitment, sacrifice, or suffering.

Why is that?

What Maturity Actually Is

Maturity is not just getting older. It is the ability to take responsibility for yourself and for others. It is the willingness to accept limits, endure hardship, and live in accordance with the truth. A mature person doesn’t just ask, "What do I want?" but "What is good?" and "What is needed of me?"

Maturity involves giving yourself for the sake of something greater than yourself. It means choosing love even when it costs you. And it means recognizing that you are not the center of the universe.

What Our Culture Teaches Instead

Our culture tells us that the self is sacred. That happiness means feeling good. That you should never have to suffer. That you should never have to give up your freedom. That anyone who makes you feel bad about yourself is toxic and should be cut out.

In this worldview, the greatest sin is discomfort. The greatest good is personal affirmation. The highest calling is to be true to yourself – even if it means leaving your marriage, walking away from your children, or abandoning your obligations.

The result? Shallow relationships. Emotional fragility. Fear of commitment. A generation of people who want intimacy without vulnerability, and purpose without sacrifice.

Extended Adolescence

We have created a world where adulthood is optional. Responsibility is deferred. Marriage is delayed. Children are avoided. Vocation is treated like a burden.

Even religion, when embraced at all, is often therapeutic and personalized: no doctrine, no demands, just spiritual vibes and vague positivity.

We have all the markers of grown-up life – jobs, bills, independence – but without the substance. Many people live as though they are still 17: living for the weekend, avoiding anything that hurts, and keeping their options open.

The Role of Responsibility

But maturity doesn’t just happen. It must be chosen. And it is formed through responsibility.

Taking on responsibility – for a family, a community, a mission – teaches us to grow. It draws us out of ourselves. It trains us to love. It teaches us discipline, patience, and sacrifice. These are not obstacles to freedom. They are the path to freedom.

The paradox is simple: the more we try to protect our comfort, the less free we become. But when we embrace responsibility, we grow stronger. We grow up.

The Model of Christ

Christ is the model of true maturity. He did not live for self-expression or comfort. He lived for the will of the Father. He emptied Himself. He bore our sins. He gave Himself completely for the good of others.

The saints are not children. They are adults in the deepest sense – formed by love, strengthened by suffering, and fully alive in the truth.

Holiness is maturity. Because love is maturity. And love is what we were made for.

Conclusion: Grow Up and Live

The world tells you to stay small. To stay soft. To stay safe. But Christ calls you to grow.

Not just in age, but in strength. In wisdom. In love.

To grow up is not to lose your joy or your wonder. It is to learn how to suffer well. How to give generously. How to endure faithfully.

Real maturity is not the loss of freedom. It is its fulfillment.

So don’t settle for extended adolescence. Don’t settle for shallow freedom. Grow up. Give yourself. And become who you were made to be.